Deja Vu.

Yet again, as history implies, the wants are exaggerated and blind. I learn now that whatever has been done was made on such confusion, such blindness and exaggeration that I can't believe I've done so. There's so much I  could tell you on what I feel right now, about what my hearts constant changing wants and needs, as if nothing apart from me really matters. Probably you'd be the only one who could understand it all. But still, forgive me for the indecency or the disrespect of it all.

Foolish as it is, I didn't learn from past mistakes. What did I garner to expect? What did I really want? From my choices? Sigh. Sadly, it gives me more reason to take this way. Maybe one day, when all is okay, you can ask about this, if you ever read it. And I'll tell you and maybe you'd understand a bit more. Maybe even then, everyone would understand a bit more.

I apologize to 'you' as well, for bringing you into all this simply because of me. For being rash and stupid too. For thinking too much and thinking too less, for doing what I did, and feeling what I feel and adding myself to your problems.

So then, goodnight to all, and all a good night, or what's left of it.